Uncle Chester's Almanac

"I wish Cheers was on the air at the same time as Glee so Sam could call a weekend with stewardesses..."

Tue, 29 May 2012 12:12:44 -0700

“I wish Cheers was on the air at the same time as Glee so Sam could call a weekend with stewardesses “regionals”.”

- Uncle C.

"Pocketbook: neither pocket, nor book. What is life all about anyways?"

Sun, 27 May 2012 14:16:47 -0700

“Pocketbook: neither pocket, nor book. What is life all about anyways?”

- Uncle C.

"UGH: Whenever I’m on the world wide web I always yell at my screen, “You ARE the weakest..."

Sat, 26 May 2012 18:15:23 -0700

“UGH: Whenever I’m on the world wide web I always yell at my screen, “You ARE the weakest link!””

- Uncle C.

"If the internet took ritalin there would be no hypertext….I don’t know, is that a joke?"

Thu, 24 May 2012 18:12:11 -0700

“If the internet took ritalin there would be no hypertext….I don’t know, is that a joke?”

- Uncle C.

"The Dictator: What is this, a movie about a rude potato?"

Sun, 20 May 2012 18:11:34 -0700

“The Dictator: What is this, a movie about a rude potato?”

- Uncle C.

"Your glasses are the incorrect size for your face. You want to find a smaller pair."

Tue, 08 May 2012 14:50:01 -0700

“Your glasses are the incorrect size for your face. You want to find a smaller pair.”

- Uncle C.

"Terrible idea: an ATV store called, “How I Met Your Mudder"

Sun, 06 May 2012 14:34:32 -0700

“Terrible idea: an ATV store called, “How I Met Your Mudder””

- Uncle C.

"Classic Animated Movie Star: Ingrid Birdman"

Sun, 29 Apr 2012 14:40:17 -0700

“Classic Animated Movie Star: Ingrid Birdman”

- Uncle C.

"Hoo let the Owls out?"

Tue, 24 Apr 2012 14:48:40 -0700

“Hoo let the Owls out?”

- Uncle C.

"I smell like a fish ate MACdonalds."

Mon, 23 Apr 2012 17:10:19 -0700

“I smell like a fish ate MACdonalds.”

- Uncle C.

"All donkeys go to heaven."

Sun, 22 Apr 2012 12:33:20 -0700

“All donkeys go to heaven.”

- Uncle C.

"Fun Fact: Billy Ocean can’t swim"

Wed, 18 Apr 2012 10:00:44 -0700

“Fun Fact: Billy Ocean can’t swim”

- Uncle C.

"I want to go back east—back to where I came from—and have all my old friends call me..."

Tue, 17 Apr 2012 10:04:09 -0700

“I want to go back east—back to where I came from—and have all my old friends call me “hollywood”.”

- Uncle C.

"My favorite part of the Bible is Jesus mentioning that when you have pizza on a bagel, you can have..."

Mon, 16 Apr 2012 13:11:27 -0700

“My favorite part of the Bible is Jesus mentioning that when you have pizza on a bagel, you can have pizza anytime.”

- Uncle C.

"Teenage slang for rich girls: Shut the french doors!"

Sun, 15 Apr 2012 10:00:24 -0700

“Teenage slang for rich girls: Shut the french doors!”

- Uncle C.

"If I was Amish and gay, the best place to meet guys would be a gay barn."

Sat, 14 Apr 2012 12:49:53 -0700

“If I was Amish and gay, the best place to meet guys would be a gay barn.”

- Uncle C.

"Alone in the bathroom, staring at the mirror, I whisper ‘Tonight was supposed to be..."

Fri, 13 Apr 2012 09:42:05 -0700

“Alone in the bathroom, staring at the mirror, I whisper ‘Tonight was supposed to be special’.”

- Uncle C.

"Baywatch Nights would have been more successful if it was called ‘Baywatch Knights’ and..."

Thu, 12 Apr 2012 18:12:15 -0700

“Baywatch Nights would have been more successful if it was called ‘Baywatch Knights’ and was a 19th century period piece aimed at women.”

- Uncle C.

"If you were Amish in that Footloose town it would be impossible to do the Electric Slide."

Tue, 13 Mar 2012 14:00:04 -0700

“If you were Amish in that Footloose town it would be impossible to do the Electric Slide.”

- Uncle C.

"Nothing about Tuesday is super."

Tue, 06 Mar 2012 16:35:38 -0800

“Nothing about Tuesday is super.”

- Uncle C.